


Spare Keys

by Psilent (HereThereBeFic)



Category: Dirk Gently - Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt
Genre: Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-13
Updated: 2014-09-13
Packaged: 2018-02-17 04:57:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2297369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HereThereBeFic/pseuds/Psilent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Differing time zones are not conducive to the asking of favors.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spare Keys

**Author's Note:**

> Events referenced take place in Salmon of Doubt.
> 
>  **Content warning:** Without context, it sort of sounds here like Kate is in an abusive relationship with Thor. I couldn't find a subtle way to work the context in, so I'll put it here: Kate and Thor are both distressed by his difficulties fitting into modern society, and by his difficulties reigning in his temper when he fails to fit into modern society, and Kate is letting him stay at her place and trying to help him out, with the knowledge that sometimes he's going to break things, and he's Not Hurting Her. He is, however, a very physically powerful man with a short temper, living with a woman and sometimes damaging her property, which... Well, it's canon, but potentially uncomfortable to read about.

Kate picks up the phone and does not say “Someone had better be dead,” because that is exactly the kind of provocation the universe does not need. She says “Hello?” instead, and tries to sound as tired as possible.

This is not difficult, seeing as it is in fact - she glances at her bedside clock, and wishes she hadn’t.

"Hello," says Dirk Gently.

Kate says “You’d better be dead.”

"Not quite," he says, infuriatingly cheerful. "I’m in Albuquerque, in fact."

Briefly, Kate considers being surprised by this information. She decides it’s not worth it. “What time,” she says, “is it in Albuquerque?”

"…Oh. Shit. Should I call back?"

"No," she sighs, and drags the phone back over to her bed, managing not to trip over the cord in the dark. "I’m awake now. Why are you in Albuquerque?"

"Ah - well, it’s an interesting story, that -"

"Dirk," she interrupts him, firmly, because it is entirely the wrong side of dusk for one of Dirk’s interesting stories. "Did that actor you were stalking go to Albuquerque?"

"No," says Dirk, sounding affronted, which his track record gives him no right to be. "He was going to Chicago. Except he wasn’t. And I wasn’t stalking him, in the sense of either the verb or the verb tense. I _am following_ him, professionally, which brings me to why I called -”

"Absolutely not."

"I thought as much. Which brings me to the _other_ reason I called - what with one thing and the other rhinoceros, I’m not certain when I’ll be back. Could I trouble you to swing by my office and make sure I locked it up?”

"I bet you didn’t." Kate does not pick up on the rhinoceros comment. He did it deliberately and she will not encourage this aggravatedly mysterious behavior. Not until she’s had a few more hours of sleep, at least. Maybe she’ll call him up at noon tomorrow and ask. Serve him right.

"You still have your key?" Dirk says anxiously, giving up on the rhinoceros for the moment.

"Yes," says Kate, and there is the usual pause that comes up whenever one of them mentions either set of spare keys, during which time they both reflect briefly on how life changes, and how nice it is to have friends, and then neither of them admits to these thoughts.

"Thank you," Dirk says, sincerely, which is close enough.

"Be careful," Kate says, which is about the same.

"I can but try. Er. I hope I didn’t wake - ?"

"He’s not around." Kate clears her throat, looks at the clock again, and feels, incredibly, more tired. "A telemarketer called around six and I haven’t seen him since."

"Ah." This pause is also familiar, and more uncomfortable. "Are you…?"

"Yeah," Kate says, meaninglessly. "Everything’s… Yeah. He’s making progress," she adds, which is at least the truth. "He didn’t break anything. Just shouted a lot and then I think he was embarrassed. I think that’s why he left. He’ll be back tomorrow trying to make me breakfast."

"I see."

"Today," she corrects herself. "It’s already today. I have an article due in _eight hours_. I _hate_ you.”

"At least I didn’t ask you to come and pick me up," Dirk points out.

"I wondered if that was what you were going for when you started saying why you called. I figured either that or you wanted me to tail the guy for you."

"The second," Dirk assures her. "Only the second."

"In that case," says Kate, "good _night_ , Dirk,” and hangs up while they’re both still laughing.


End file.
